EVERY TIME I GET REMINDED THAT CHUCK NORRIS IS A TWAT, I WONDER WHY WE’RE NOT MAKING THOSE JOKES ABOUT SOMEONE WHO’S ACTUALLY COOL

nuderefsarebest:

drtanner:

Like Idris Elba, for example. I can’t think of a single Chuck Norris joke that couldn’t be far better applied to Idris Elba.

THERE USED TO BE A STREET NAMED AFTER IDRIS ELBA BUT THEY HAD TO RENAME IT BECAUSE NO ONE CROSSES IDRIS ELBA AND LIVES.

IDRIS ELBA AND SUPERMAN ONCE FOUGHT EACH OTHER FOR A BET. THE LOSER HAD TO START WEARING HIS UNDERWEAR ON THE OUTSIDE OF HIS PANTS.

SOME MAGICIANS CAN WALK ON WATER. IDRIS ELBA CAN SWIM THROUGH LAND.

IDRIS ELBA CAN SLAM A REVOLVING DOOR.

DEATH ONCE HAD A NEAR-IDRIS ELBA EXPERIENCE.

IDRIS ELBA IS IMMUNE TO HEART ATTACKS. HIS HEART ISN’T NEARLY FOOLISH ENOUGH TO ATTACK HIM.

IDRIS ELBA CAN WIN A GAME OF CONNECT FOUR IN THREE MOVES.

WHEN IDRIS ELBA DOES A PRESS-UP, HE ISN’T LIFTING HIMSELF UP. HE’S PUSHING THE EARTH DOWN.

Try to tell me this shit isn’t better with Idris Elba.

You can’t. Because it is.